Endless struggle of a twenty-something

“Those were the days my friends

We though it never ends….”

Yes those were the days when all you have to do is eat, and sleep, and make damn sure you are not on the top from the bottom-up of the class. Your lovely parents wouldn’t like that.

Those were the days when you dreamt your life away, among reading manga and watch cartoon, thinking some days you would grow up and have your own ways. Well, suck it up, I’m telling ya, you ain’t gonna have your ways.

Those were the days when you thought leaving the country, starting off somewhere else in 6 years would make you pretty impressive eh? Living the time of your life, crawling back up after one crazy night and boy that was fun! You thought those days would last… and no, what the hell is responsibility anyway?

Tell me, have you ever heard of these phrases: “live up to your expectations”?

“Be the one you’re supposed to be?”

And “the money was invested in you, is not for you to slack off like this”.

“You were not going study abroad to return here and receive the payment of 400$ per month”, how can you support yourself? How can you take care of your future family?”;

“Where is you second bachelor’s certificate? You think you can live just by being a translator? Those languages are tool, not a mean to make money.”

“You think you work for one year you know a lot now, don’t cha? You haven’t created anything significant yet.”

“You are nowhere near as experienced as you should, to survive this world”. What you need is stability, not those frivolous, useless activities you do all nights.”

“You know nothing.”

“You are nothing.”

It’s an endless struggle, with what you have, what you know you want, what you are expected to be, what you try not to be, what you don’t ever want to be, and what you simply are. You think you get into the university, the struggle would end? You think you graduate from the university, successfully get your bachelor degree, the struggle would end? You think you get a job, the struggle would end?

How simple-minded you are, how selfish you are, how….normal you are.

For all my twenty-something friends of mine out there, who are still struggling, and who feel the same, trust me, IT’S NEVER GONNA END. You will constantly here those things, inside your head, outside your world. And you wonder why you can keep your sanity that long.

But all you need to know is asking yourself these questions:

  • Is this what you want/ still want? If yes, then keep doing it. If no, doing something else, as soon as possible.
  • Are you doing what you can do best? If yes, good for you. If no, try to create opportunities to do it. Small chances lead to great change.
  • Can you support yourself, if you leave your parents’ house right now? If yes, great, do it when you are mentally prepared – one year is enough. If no, find a goddamn job and pay for your meals, your clothes, your basic needs. Then we’ll talk.
  • Are you ashamed of yourself? If no, you are on the right track. No one should make you feel bad about being you, yeah I know some of you are weirdos, but so am I. The sooner we accept all the sides the better. If yes, talk to me, immediately, I’m gonna shower you with compliments, until you put your feet on the ground again.

If you already knew your way out of this little mad world here, congratulation! Have a great life.

Just remember, we are all going to end the same way.


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